Distinguish between fact and speculation
If your reply is late or you contact them the wrong number of times, you may wonder, “Has my interest waned?” However, you cannot confirm the other person's heart with just a message. There could be many reasons, including work and study, the way you relax, your habit of checking your phone, etc. Try to separate your observations from your interpretations.
“I received a reply today to the message I sent yesterday afternoon” is a verifiable fact. “You don’t consider me important” could be an interpretation based on that fact. Rather than passing your interpretation straight as criticism, try talking about how the situation made you feel and what you want.
Asking what you want from contact
The purpose of contact may vary from person to person. Some people feel close by sharing their days, while others find it easier to communicate around necessary schedules and focus when they meet in person. No one method can be seen as representing more sincere affection.
Ask questions that are easy to answer, such as “At what time of the day do you feel comfortable contacting me?” or “Do you prefer to briefly update the situation when you are busy, or do you prefer to respond when you have some free time?” Explaining what contact means to you will help the other person understand your needs.
Make an appointment without pressure
A small standard that can be followed in daily life is sufficient for agreement, rather than a strict rule such as replying every hour. For example, you can notify schedule changes as far in advance as possible, provide a brief update on busy days, and share a time frame when a response may be delayed.
If a situation arises where it is difficult to keep a promise, rather than criticizing, inform the company of the changed circumstances and adjust the new standards together. Your method of contact may change as your relationship and schedule change. Checking occasionally to see if “this level of frequency is still ok” can reduce the amount of patience and second-guessing.
MBTI is not a tool to determine communication habits or determine who is more affectionate. A conversation that asks and confirms how each other actually feels comfortable is more useful than making assumptions about types.